We were so excited to take Gabe home (or away from the hospital, at least), for a few days. It was surreal, as I wheeled him down to the car. He had been fussy since before we had packed up to leave, but he fell asleep in the car.
Judah was in the other side in his carseat asleep too. It was the perfect moment.
When we got to Nick's parents house, unloaded all of Gabe's equipment (There is a lot of it), he cried. He cried every second he was awake, passing out for a while and then waking up very upset again.
I felt like something was very wrong, that it wasn't normal baby crying- but of course no one wants to admit this, that we need to take him back in. So, we toughed it out. We bounced, rocked, jiggled, swaddled, unswaddled, and tried.
I knew pretty quickly that it wasn't going away, although I hoped I was wrong.

The problem with being married is that you have to be in agreement, and neither of us wanted to admit that our first attempt at normalcy had ended. In trying to be diplomatic, I suggested we take Gabe in if he still was inconsolable after his nap.

We got to bedtime, tucked him in his bassinet and hoped for the best. Gabe woke up every hour or so crying, having terrible diapers and his breathing rate just wasn't slowing when he went to sleep. Nick and I both agreed that it was time to call it quits and take him in. We called his cardiologist and let them know what was happening.

When we got to the hospital, Gabe's blood gas wasn't looking good, as we suspected. He was extremely upset when we got there. They placed an IV and withheld his food... Which was terrible since his middle of the night feed didn't complete, so he hadn't eaten since 1am. The poor guy didn't get to eat anything until 11am, after hours of us demanding he be fed. (He calmed down immediately after it started).

We were told that he would be checked in again, and most likely stay till his g-tube surgery.

I think this blow was especially hard. We got out the doors, only to turn right around.

It's a lot to deal with, mentally.

It looks like going home for thanksgiving is out of the picture.

That really hurts right now- I have to be honest, it's been so difficult lately. Not knowing what is going to happen is hard.

1 comment:

Mandy said...

Oh, I am so sorry. That has to be incredibly difficult. I can only imagine how hard that must be. I am so glad you got to take him home briefly, but I am sorry that it wasn't restful. I will be praying for you guys as you continue to wait. The Lord is so very, very good, and I am thankful that I can have a small part in your journey through praying.

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